The Waco Window
Story circa April 1st, 1998 | View Post

This is nothing more than another relatively short college antic that took place in Waco and involved Tom Kelley, Nathan Christianson, and of course me.

I had come up to visit the guys in Waco as I had done a few times before, and as we had done a few times before, we got pretty drunk.  The story with Tom and I usually went something like this: 'Ludlow always finds a way to get into trouble, Tom always finds a way to get into trouble, put them together and something terrible is bound to happen to someone else.'  The strange thing in this case was that I think Nathan had more involvement in the destruction than did Tom.  Either way, Tom always played an integral role.

Some time in the latter part of the evening we headed over towards one of their friend's apartments.  Across the street from this apartment was a new condominium being developed. The three of us happened to walk over that way to pee.  And yes, I'm sure we could have just used the bathroom inside, but this seemed like a better plan at the time. Who doesn't love peeing outside?

Once we'd zipped up, the next logical step was to break some of the windows at the new development.  Yes, nothing more than drunken college vandalism at it's finest.  This is actually where I don't think Tom played a huge role, as a very rare change.  In fact, I seem to recall him being inside of the house doing something entirely different than Nathan and I, albeit probably still destructive, but I digress.

Nathan and I began picking up 2x4s on the ground and hurling them at the windows from no more than 20 feet away.  Naturally you'd expect that the windows would have shattered into pieces, but they did not.  In fact, the windows seemed to absorb the shock of the wood with pleasure. With each new impact, the window would let off a springy sounds and sent our pieces of wood to the ground.  Over and over again we tried to destroy these windows, each throw more frustrating than the last.  How was it possible that two drunk college 18 year old guys couldn't destroy these windows?

Well needless to say, our luck was about to change quite heavily.  After repeated failed attempts at breaking the windows, a local Waco squad car and then another pulled up at the scene.  Evidently someone had called them in for vandalizing a local property.  At this point in my life I'd experienced run-ins with the police so many times for mischievous behavior that I'm not sure I was even phased.  They asked us what we were doing and of course we explained that we were just casually checking out the property.  After being told that they were called there for people breaking the windows, we rather pompously pointed out that the claim had been false as none of the windows were in fact broken.

After some back and forth debate and running of our licenses (something I would never let happen today), we were told we could go on the condition that we didn't drive our car (evidently the cops were also keen to the fact that we'd been drinking a bit).  They went so far to tell us that they were going to periodically check on Tom's car throughout the night and if it was gone, they were going to come and get us.

The moral of the story is that high-cost windows are your friends, even when you are trying to kill them.

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